For many of us, our path through life feels like doors opening and closing. Sometimes we are hoping for a specific route to be open and we are faced with a closed door. Sometimes a new door appears and we are hesitant to take it. But what about when we already have decided to go down one path, through one door, when another door appears?
Many of you will know that not too long ago, I (Aleena) helped Jacob write a post announcing my decision to go into Obstetrics and Gynecology for my specialty. I was ready. I was prepared. I had my spreadsheets done and was ready to go down the application trail. This was 3 years in the making and I was fully committed to this path. And then God showed me another door.
My first thought was “why now?” Why wasn’t this door shown to me sooner? Why was this happening at the beginning of fourth year? Why now? My mom gave me a great answer to this question… “you weren’t ready for it.”
Have any of you been in this spot? A door was shown to you at (what you would consider) a difficult, unfortunate, weird, stressful time? But if that door would have opened sooner, you wouldn’t have given it the time of day, because you weren’t ready.
So, here’s how it happened. 😊
May 26th 5:45am, those two pink lines showed up. Our joy and excitement could barely be contained. We hugged and cried and celebrated because we were having a baby! And then, I got nervous. I found out so early, I was only 4 weeks pregnant. So we told our parents and kept it quiet.
As the weeks progressed, our anxieties started to lessen and I knew I needed to talk to the school. My due date was February 2nd and I needed a plan to finish medical school. I arranged a meeting with student affairs on June 9 to put a plan together. The administration was great! A plan was put together and I was ready to take on fourth year with the intent of finishing at the end of January and having a maternity leave.
Before I left the office the director looked at me and asked “have you considered dual applying?” … What?
Dual applying is the process of applying for two different types of specialties for residency with the understanding that you’ll end up in one of them. This was never something I had planned on. Why was he asking me this? He mentioned a couple programs including Family Medicine with a focus in obstetrics. My mind was whirling and I told him I would look into it. Now mind you, I was 2 days away from taking Step 2. This wasn’t the time to have a complete change in the plan. So I tucked that information in the back of my mind and moved forward.
June 11th – this was the day I took Step 2. I was prepared and ready… for it to be over. This was the last big exam of medical school! The day went by slowly, but also rather quickly. Jacob and I celebrated that night for both taking Step 2 and our 5 year anniversary. A quick glimpse into the future would show us celebrating a passing score that was higher than I expected! I was feeling thankful and proud of myself for the work I put in and the improvement this score showed.
June 21st. I had just finished my first day of my acting internship in Maternal Fetal Medicine. My Attendings were amazing and the cases were interesting. My OBGYN advisor was one of the attending physicians I was working with. I sat down in his office and asked if I could ask an advising question. I told him about my meeting with student affairs and asked “what are your thoughts on dual applying?” He took a second to think before telling me it didn’t seem like a bad idea. We talked for a while about how the perception around dual applying has changed and that based on my test scores, resume, and experiences, this could be a good thing for me. Then he said, “You know, we’ve talked a few times and I know some of your values and goals that are shaping what you want your attending life to look like. Have you considered family medicine with an obstetrics focus?” … funny you should mention it. I left his office feeling better, but asking the question “what does this mean?” Why did I have two advisors asking me the same question?
June 22nd. I had just finished rounding with my second attending on maternal-fetal medicine when he asked “so, why OB/GYN?” So I gave him my whys. I told him that I liked the diversity in care. I loved working with women. I wanted longitudinal care. I wanted to be involved in the big moments. I wanted to provide women’s health in the rural communities. I told him what I could see my future looking like. He nodded along and took a few seconds to think. He turned to me and asked, “have you considered Family Medicine with an OB focus?”
This wasn’t a coincidence anymore. I just kind of chuckled and said, “I think I’ll look into that.”
So I did. I spent days researching Family medicine residencies. I looked to see what they offered and what I could be trained in. I set up meetings to talk with some family physicians in my life to learn about their decision to pursue family med. I talked with Jacob, Mom, Dad, Christi, and Brian. And then I spent time thinking about my core values. What did I want my life as a physician to look like?
I want to be a great wife. I want to be a great mom. I want to be a great doctor. I want to live and work in a rural area. I want to provide care for a community similar to the ones that poured into me when I was growing up. I want to be a part of a community that will love my family. I want to help bring women’s health to areas that may not have the best access. I want to provide longitudinal care. I want to know my patients well and be there for all of the big changes in life. I want diversity in my work. I want to work with people of all ages. I want to do some procedures and I want time to counsel and teach patients. And at the end of the day, I want to go home and enjoy my family. I want to take my kids fishing, go camping, explore some cities and state parks. I want to have Sunday brunch with my family after church. Being a physician is important, but being present with my family and enjoying my life outside of work is even more important. Can I do all this as an OB/GYN? Probably. But when I look at what matters to me and the work I want to do… Family medicine with a focus on rural and women’s health is the better decision for me.
When God showed me another door, I hesitantly opened it to see what could be and I found myself falling in love with medicine and becoming a doctor all over again. When I really dug deep to figure out what I really wanted to do, I found I wanted to be a primary care physician for the rural population in northern Indiana or northwest Ohio, providing care that they need!
And that’s how it happened. In a span of 3 weeks, I completely changed what my future would look like and I am so excited to watch it unfold. If there is anything I want you to get from my story it’s this…
- God will use people in your life to get your attention! Pay attention and listen. There are big things at work in your life!
- When God shows you another door, take a peak! You may find that there is a completely different path that is perfect for you that you didn’t consider before.
- Change can be really good! Be open to new doors and do your research!
